Diamonds aren’t a girl’s best friend

Diamonds have always held a particular allure.  The hardest of all precious stones, they are traditionally associated with love and marriage.  Marilyn Monroe sang, "Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend" the 1953 film "Gentlemen Prefer Blondes," and Ian Fleming's master spy James Bond battled a villainous smuggler in "Diamonds Are Forever." Those two lines have become central to one of the longest running, most lucrative, successful and patently deceptive advertising campaigns in history.

While diamonds are prized for their visual and industrial qualities, the question remains, are they really "forever?"  Is a diamond really a "girl's best friend?"  As it happens, the answer is a resounding "no" on both scores.

By now, anyone who's heard of diamonds should know about conflict diamonds, also known as "blood diamonds." These are diamonds that have been mined and purchased from West African nations mired in brutal civil wars.  Most of the diamonds bought and sold in the United States come from countries whose governments use the proceeds to purchase weapons.  According to Amnesty International, diamonds have fueled wars that have killed over 4 million people and torn countries apart.  In many of these nations, rebel groups terrorize citizens and force them to work in mines so they can pay for their own war efforts.  The diamond industry is either unwilling, or unable, to do anything about it.

In Sierra Leone, for example, a rebel group led by a man named Foday Sankoh used the diamond trade to fund its war against the government.  This group became infamous for dismembering villagers, cutting the hands and feet off men, women and children alike.

Are diamonds really "forever?"  Only if you're a man trying to figure out how to feed a family after your foot has been cut off.  Are they really a "girl's best friend?"  Not if you're a 10- year-old whose hands have been cut off by a psychotic butcher.

The industry has a system of controls called the Kimberley Process, which sounds a lot like choosing a prom date, that's supposed to protect against these sorts of abuses.  But two of the countries that are part of the process are Zimbabwe and South Africa, both of which are diamond sources.  Zimbabwe is currently ruled by the tyrant Robert Mugabe, who has a well-documented history of abuse against his own people and depends on the diamond trade to fund his dictatorship.  Can we really trust either country?

But hey, how else can two months' salary last forever?

Speaking of which, another fun fact about diamonds is that every diamond sold in America is over-graded by two grades, and overpriced by at least double.  In other words, you will never get back even half what you paid for that rock.  The only commodity that retains its value as poorly as a diamond is a car.  That's not an investment; that's a waste of money.

Diamonds aren't even particularly rare.  They're mined by the millions and sold worldwide for industrial, scientific and, for lack of a better word, entertainment purposes.  It's only the perception of scarcity, and the skill of the jeweler, that enables the industry to keep the prices artificially inflated.  There's nothing special about the process that creates them, either.  The geological process of compressing carbon over millions of years can now be reproduced in a laboratory in a matter of hours.  A 2003 article in Wired magazine detailed how a lab in Florida produced yellow diamonds of such quality that professional gem traders were unable to distinguish them from natural diamonds.

Diamonds aren't special.  They're not rare.  They're certainly not a girl's best friend, and they definitely aren't forever.  So this year instead of blowing thousands of dollars to help some dictator pay for a few more AK-47s, take that two months' salary and buy something useful.  Perhaps donate some of it to Amnesty International, UNICEF, OXFAM International or any other worthy organization.

Just don't buy a diamond.